http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/ en Sun, 22 Nov 2009 05:23:16 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/images/insignia/misc/rss.jpg http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/ http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/822-netherlands.html Sat, 11 Oct 2008 00:55:28 GMT well, in 12 hrs iīll be in the netherlands. will probably be really quiet here. hopefully there will be no hitches but there are clouds on the horizon and i canīt tell what theīll bring yet. wish me 3 weeks of luck :s well, in 12 hrs iīll be in the netherlands. will probably be really quiet here. hopefully there will be no hitches but there are clouds on the horizon and i canīt tell what theīll bring yet. wish me 3 weeks of luck :s ]]> lotsofmagnets http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/822-netherlands.html http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/555-vent.html Wed, 10 Sep 2008 00:49:55 GMT i just need to get this off my chest. all my friends are in different timezones so iīm on my own right when everything seems to be going wrong. well, i sent my now ex-friend an email telling her what happened on the trip and that i donīt want to have anything to do with her again. she wasted no... i just need to get this off my chest. all my friends are in different timezones so iīm on my own right when everything seems to be going wrong.

well, i sent my now ex-friend an email telling her what happened on the trip and that i donīt want to have anything to do with her again. she wasted no time sending me back an message on facebook that ripped through my personality. incredibly, the accusation of wanting to sleep with her was there. so yeah i just lost one of my closest friends and i know the damage is irreparable.

within the same 15 minute timeframe i get a random message from francine that sheīs now in a relationship. she finally decided it was going to happen between her and her best friend. i think i had secretly hoped for the impossible but now i can see that it has only been tearing me to shreds. i guess at least thatīs closure on that one. then i get to spend 3 weeks in the netherlands in a month. i should still go but perhaps spend very little time in utrecht.

work is a miserable place atm. my boss only left 10 minutes ago. heīs going to work himself to death at this rate. the 2nd in charge got fucked over by the company as did one of my co-workers. they fucked me over a few months ago but i still remember. we are drastically understaffed and iīll be pulling extra shifts left right and centre. extra money ahoy but this is coming at the expense of my soul i think.

itīs like every worst-case scenario has managed to play itself out at the same time. iīm off to sleep. goodnight. ]]> lotsofmagnets http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/555-vent.html http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/510-friend.html Thu, 04 Sep 2008 17:36:28 GMT "look james, u made me feel like shit the week we travelled 2gether. ur gonna hafta work harder 2 make me care. donīt need ur ītude when got plenty of gr8 friends"

this was a completely unexpected reply from a simple "iīm thinking about moving to the mainland" message to a person who iīve considered one of my closest friends now for nearly 10 years. we travelled together back in may and there has been nothing like this mentioned up to now. no warnings nothing on the trip itself or afterwards. weīve even spoken afterwards and again no mention but 2 nights ago i get that as a random reply to a message. normally i have a clue as to what i may have done even if i say i have no idea but this time i really canīt see anything within that week that would have caused anything, let alone words which i consider so strong. mind you this person is usually in front of the computer all the time and now hasnīt for a couple of days. iīve sent a message on facebook but iīm assuming it hasnīt been read yet. iīve fretted a lot about this but i guess all i can do is wait until i get a reply (if i get one.) itīs frustrating really not knowing what iīve apparently done wrong and sad that from the tone of the message a friend of mine (and a close on up to now) considers their friends disposable.

update: just recieved a response to my question of "is everything alright and care to elaborate on the sms" which was: Hi, Everything is fine. I don't want to character assassinate you. C.

i think this could get interesting. ]]> lotsofmagnets http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/510-friend.html http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/465-trip-netherlands.html Sun, 31 Aug 2008 16:46:26 GMT well, i went to the netherlands a few days ago, hence being totally absent once again. this trip was on the back of a trip to slovenia to visit family and also spending a night in milano with some former guests i had in rvk. it was an absolute blast and i had a great time. right upto when i reached... well, i went to the netherlands a few days ago, hence being totally absent once again. this trip was on the back of a trip to slovenia to visit family and also spending a night in milano with some former guests i had in rvk. it was an absolute blast and i had a great time. right upto when i reached the netherlands. from that point onwards it felt like a total disaster. and i think it was my fault. i had been warned that she was stressed at work and when i arrived she was a bit sick. she still did her best while i was there but i found her to be quite cold towards me (in hindsight very understandably since she had warned me about work and she was sick) and i sort of imploded a bit and started to get a bit depressed. by 1/2 way through the day i was there all i wanted to do was leave. well, i did and came home feeling really flat. to make things worse for me she messaged and apologised for being such a bad host. she feels she neglected me while i was there and i suspect she thinks that caused my mood, which it did to a degree but i had plenty of time to prepare and shouldnīt have acted the way i did. yesterday i finally came down sick and strangely felt really good so i think the feeling funny for the past few days and the lack of sleep may have been part of the reason i was the person i was while i was there and also really moody back home the past few days. i feel a bit more excited about the idea of the mainland and i think of it now more as a challenge than a potentially bad choice. will be talking to the boss at work tomorrow about taking 2-3 weeks off in oct to explore the netherlands both geographically and socially and will seriously be considering a move early next year. yeah, iīm defo a little more excited now. ]]> lotsofmagnets http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/blogs/lotsofmagnets/465-trip-netherlands.html