I put the boo on the bus this morning. I know she is too old for me to get all maudlin about it, but still it jabbed at my heart a little...watching her get on the bus.

Afterwards I walked Simba back by the lake - the surface of the water was completely smooth and the reflection of the pink and blue wispy clouds with amber splashes from the rising sun looked like exquisitely delicate painted glass. It took my breath away and I did cry a little.

Maybe it's weird, but those are some of my favorite moments - happiness, exaltation...but tinged with a little sadness. It's like striking a balance - I can almost hear a bell sounding in my head - that's it, that's the place.

Or maybe I'm just too dreamy this morning...

I feel really good. Happy, calm, hopeful, secure.

***

In other news, a dachsund tried to eat my dog. Little shit.

...the ones I make tonight are sure to look nothing like these

but, yum, don't those motherfuckers look delicious?

I had a dream last week that I haven't been able to let go...seems important somehow.

In the dream I had a friend who was a spider. Kind of like this one:



And I loved this spider, respected it, and wanted it to feel these things from me, even though it was a spider and we were not able to communicate.

The whys are fuzzy, but at some point the need came for me to allow the spider to crawl on me - and I allowed it to with no small amount of trepidation, with fear I tried to hide. I could feel very keenly the spider crawling first onto my shoulder, then down the front of my shirt and up my back. It made my skin crawl and my impulse was to flick the spider off, but I knew that if I did that I would possibly harm it and for certain hurt it's feelings. The spider crawled all over my upper body and I was just getting used to it when I felt it crawl...