OK. as the impending doom rears it's ugly head closer, I continue in my systematic panic and manic mode. Why does everything have to happen at the same time? Is this really adulthood?

So far, I'm stuck. I really don't like school. You will hate me when you realize the aspects I HATE about it are the little things things such as waking up early in the morning. You see, I wake up early when I don't have to, when I do have to, I get late despite the fact that I woke up early anyway.

Number two is tests. When I was in high school, I "wung" every test that came my way. Even my finals. I just didn't give a sh**. I got barely above average grades though. You see, I remembered some things because half the tests involved application. Common sense. I wasn't serious enough. You know, sometimes chilling out just isn't good for you.

So recently I started talking to people again. Including girls. Yes. There is a girl I'm talking to. Now why this...

Well,

I picked my user name at the time 300 was released. Honestly that was the first time I ever heard of Xerxes. Even then I misspelled his name meaning I knew nothing about the character but I needed to be like him. Why, I don't know just yet... I'm not too sure. I wanted to emulate a character I heard of for the first time on a cinema screen.

Let's think then, why did I want to be a false God. Which is worse than human? In the movie I didn't see a false god, but a god in his own right. Xerxes was powerful. Sure the bastard was a monster, but I give him credit and acknowledge him as a god. No honestly, he whipped and bound a river into submission. If that's not godly, geez, I don't know ...

This man was powerful because he had resources and knew how to navigate the task placed before him which was kingship by birthright. I don't think I've heard of a historical figure who was actually born to do something and did it well.

That's...

I tell you now people ... during this recession, we need stability, we need comfort, we need these!!!


Go now to your local walmart and buy these. I promise you the world. All will fall apart and you will become anorexic, filthy (rich) and famous. People will know your name. And they will love you.

They are so comfortable I want to get 8 more pairs. And soooooo cheap. I think I have underpaid for them. I'll go to walmart and ask if they want more money for them.

On a side note: All clothes I have that are actually so damn comfortable I wear them to the ground come from friggin Walmart. Why is that?!?!?!?!?!

I went to a store at the Crabtree mall today and ambled into a store that sold suits. I don't have nice things. I really want a suit that costs $300.00 just to validate myself. I know I sound shallow but I have all this working and not doing anything that's getting to my head.

A while back my volatile ego was fractured when a co-worker mentioned that the polo shirt I was wearing was faded. I shrugged it off and didn't think about it till I came home when I took a look at all my clothes and they had the same problem. I like electronics more than I like clothes. Clothes are cumbersome artifacts that annoy me to no end. Must be why I've been dressed by my sister ever since I was born. Even when I need clothes I just send her out.

I am good at finding electronics. I have handpicked all the electronics my family owns and they have lasted them years. Good quality too for great value. But I don't have any electronics myself. I honestly can't justify spending any...

OK, I hate when this happens. I have these drops in my timelines at some of the most inorpotune times. I am just about to start school of some incomprehensible hardcore mathematics and all I can think about is why the hell don't I have a life.

All my friends (ohh yes, I have friends now) tell me I am at a pretty normal state. I am broke, makes no sense seeing as I work and have no kids... My apartment is empty. I have a bed and my kitchen is fully furnished. Nice things, you know, I figured why invest in a bed when I'm not sleeping or doing anything at all in it. I never bought a TV, I don't watch TV, only select few TV sahows that I illegally downlaod!!!!

My life has been same things over and over again and I am getting tired of the repetition!!! So why the F**** am I scared of going to school. I am kinda sorta proud of a few things that I have been able to achieve but the thing is, when you focus on something too much you don't do other things.
...