Vindicated0411

Hi ladies, I could use a little help. Warm weather is coming around and recently starting dating a new guy who is an absolute hottie! Hes from a coastal community and loves the outdoors so I can't wait for it to get a little warmer and start visiting his house back home (we're both in college right now). Anyways, to be completely honest I have self-esteem issues and am not the most comfortable with my body. He is aware of this. I'm not quite sure what hes doing with me, but I think hes great and hope to see things go well in the future for the two of us. With all that in mind, I don't particularly like swim suits but knowing I will probably end up in one in a couple weeks I had a few questions. I believe I have some greek that runs on one side of my family and I inherited the dark hair, not only on my head but my entire body. Bleh! The dilemma is I am extremely pale with dark hair, so even after such things as shaving my legs you can see some of the black hair below my skin. I also have an issue with my bikini area, I have really thick course hair, the same happens. I shave and you can still see hair as well as I get razor burn regardless of what i do down there. However, my main issue is my stomach. I have a small area below my belly button that has some dark, course hairs that are completely unsightly. I tried plucking, I think that just made them worse. I 've tried shaving and that just caused ingrown hairs and they are so thick a day later they are above the surface of my skin again. I haven't tried professional waxing, but being realistic, I am in college and can't afford it. I am hoping there are some ladies out there who can relate and help me out with any advice you might have. I have completely decided once I gradute and have a little money to spare I plan to have some laser hair removal done on my stomach and bikini line area. But in the meantime I could use any advice you ladies have. On an ending note, this even causes problems when we are being intimate with one another because I hate the way all of this looks and I don't want him to see it obviously. So the mood strikes him right in the mornings, I usually come up with some excuse to keep from taking my clothes off.

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Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far.~ Teddy Roosevelt

Shaindra

Epilator. I have the Braun Silk-Epil. Yes, it hurts some, but I think that the results are worth it. Touch-ups have to happen every week or so, depending on how fast your hair grows. I like that you don't have to wait until you have long hair before touching up, like with waxing.

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"Never regret something that once made you smile."

settie

You could bleach the hair I suppose, I've never tried it myself, but I know some people do it, and like the results.
To get rid of ingrowns, grab a body buff and scrub scrub scrub...then when you get out of the shower pat dry and put on some ingrown hair treatment lotion...men after shave lotions usually work well for this. I order this product. Though it seems pricey, the bottle should last a good while. I've had mine for almost a year now, and I'm not even half way through it.
If that's too much work, I've heard this trick before: apply an astringent with salicylic acid over the area with a cotton swab. Apparently that releases the hairs.
Hmmm, maybe applying a tanner wouldn't make the hairs look so dark? I'm not sure about that one. All I know is, when I'm very pale, even my blondest hairs look a little dark, but when I tan, they're barely noticeable.
As for self esteem, keep working on it sweetie. It takes time to love your body, flaws and all. Just know that if he really cares about you, something like this won't even phase him. I'll betcha that if you get the confidence to love your body, and let him see you like that, he'll be completely attracted to your confidence, and never notice. ^_^

jRuntlets

I'm in the same boat with you hon. I'm so pale you can see my veins and the hairs under my skin - but I've taken a poll of friends and they don't notice it until I point it out.

Personally, I pluck the few hairs on my stomach and just keep after them. If you get the whole hair out then it shouldn't be re-appearing for awhile.

Bikini line - that has to be the worst. I either use the pre-waxed strips that come in a yellow box (Nair I think). They're amazing. Or I wear boy shorts or board shorts. That way you don't have to worry about anyone seeing the bikini line.

You're more critical of yourself than anyone else is, keep that in mind. Have fun!

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genuinegirly

There are some great tips here!

I have several friends who bleach, never tried it myself.

As for shaving in general - I've found that men's razors give me a closer shave than women's. I use the Schick Xtreme SubZero. I take a few minutes to soak in a tub with warm water. This process seems to yeild a closer shave. Use mild soap, apply moisturizer immediately afterward to avoid ingrown hairs.

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tinydancer

tanning will make the hair anywhere on your body appear a lighter color... And if your skin is reluctant to tanning at the fake 'n bake or good ol' outdoors, try the sunless tanning kits. Best i've found in that area is Clinique or Jergens.

Also... Pure Romance has a great product called Coochy Cream lol... it is AMAZING and does wonders. I haven't purchased any in quite some time but I highly reccommend it.

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My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am i doing right?
-Charles M. Schulz

jewels

For the shaving, instead of soap, try (hair) conditioner. I used to give my girls all my unwanted conditioners, but I keep one that's really thick and use it instead of soap or a shower gel. It makes the shaving really easy, helps keep the cut close and I have much less irritation when shaving the bikini/pubic area.

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Politics is applesauce.


- Will Rogers

settie

oooh interesting! I should try that out...how much conditioner do you apply?

jewels

Depends how thick the conditioner is. I use it as I used to use Barbasol shaving cream, probably massive amounts.

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Politics is applesauce.


- Will Rogers

merleniau

I use Coochy Cream for shaving. I like it.

I have gotten a brazilian wax before (twice) and loved it. Sure, it hurt.. but it lasted a long time and you couldn't see the stubble under the skin until it started growing in after a few days. Unfortunately, waxing doesn't work that well unless you either grow the hair out (and trim it! but no shaving) for a long time (so that all follicles have growth) or wax continuously so that all of the follicles start growing together on the same "schedule."

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. And remember that if he didn't find you attractive in the first place, he wouldn't be intimate with you.. so don't worry about some little hairs! Maybe he needs to just pay you more compliments.

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"Without passion man is a mere latent force and possibility, like the flint which awaits the shock of the iron before it can give forth its spark."
— Henri-Frédéric Amiel

savmesom11

I could give you advice on what to do to fix your flaws but in all honesty.....your man is with you because he WANTS to be. Men don't see what we see when we look in the mirror. They are turned on by our curves and perfections and imperfections. It is amazing the way they love us, give him what he is already begging for.....YOU. If you love yourself and show confidence that is the sexiest aphrodisiac that he could ever ask for. Unfortunately at your age (and please don't take that as an insult) you are still comparing your body to those that you see in fashion magazines, when you get a little older you will see that most woman are just as you are, hairy, a little flabby, and even stretch marks thrown in. Love yourself sister there is nothing sexier.

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Be prepared to control whatever personality awakes in you each day.

I am the solution in search of a problem.

ghoastgirl1

I love those sally hanson strips you do at home. I find I can handle the pain alright. Just take a deep breath before you rip all of those little hairs out.
By the way, I'm in a similar situation.
I'm fair skinned and dark haired. I was also on swim team so the bikini line was an issue of constant proportions.
Over time all the waxing made my hair down there thinner. Or maybe thats just my genetics at work...

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Bitch, Rub me

Taja

I have found that the easiest way for me, is to simply shave daily. With a very sharp razor. I change the blades, at the most, weekly. And I stumbled upon a body wash that works great for a shaving cream. It's St. Ives Mineral Therapy Body Wash. It seems to help with razor burn and bumps, too.

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and makes the world seem like a better place.

little_tippler

brazilian wax is awesome, hurts lots but totally worth it. Lasts maybe 3 weeks hair free. Ingrowns...they happen, but if you buff it should keep them down to a minimum.

Also, there is a lotion I use that makes hairs weaker and grow back slower. There's lots of products out there like this, it's called a hair growth retardant.

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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

XtinaHollywood

i have the same problem! i have a little color because i'm half columbian though, so it's probably not as bad.

i've found that as long as you're confident in your body, your man probably won't even notice because he'll be to entertained making love to you. so i say don't worry about the products as much as be happy about who you are, he chose you for a reason that a few hairs won't get in the way. = )

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life is like a box of chocolates

Kaimi

I have seen those products as well but was somewhat put off by them. They had claims that it was a soy product that reduced the growth, if you actually read the ingredients on the bottle they contain lye which is the active ingredient. Also, they take an incredible amount of time to do anything at all.

I use this Nair Roll-On Wax with some good results but again there is the issue about growing the hair out long enough and the hair getting in sync in the growth pattern. It is basically a sugaring treatment, I found the discomfort tolerable. Though one thing I would recommend, is that (especially in the bikini area) you not use the roll on. Instead, tip the bottle so that the "wax" starts to pour and use either your fingertip or a tongue depressor (or similar tool) to pull the wax out and spread it where you need it. Rolling it onto the pubic area probably caused me more discomfort than the waxing itself.

Regular Nair also works wonders. The depilatory does not smell as foul as it did previously, quick and easy.

flipflops228

I have dark, coarse hair on my legs and bikini area. I get a Brazilian wax every 4-5 weeks. It hurt the first couple times, but now I can't go without them!

I've tried every razor under the sun on my legs, but I swear that I have "man hair." I usually shave every other day. I'd love to get laser hair removal but it's so expensive and I've heard it really hurts.

I think that girls believe every other girl is much less hairy than them, which probably isn't the case. He's probably less bothered by it than you are.

I do suggest waxing if you've never tried it. Take a Motrin before and you'll be fine!

creepysusie

I usually try to wax my legs. Yeah, coarse asian hair = not fun

onesnowyowl

Well, there is an actual prescription product called Vaniqa that works as a hair growth retardant. It contains eflornithine, a medication originally used for sleeping sickness that when applied topically retards hair growth. And the bottle of Jergens Naturally Smooth I had in my cabinet revealed its active ingredient to be an herbal extract from the great burnet plant (sangsuisorba officinalis), which isn't harmful in the slightest.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

trickyy21

Yes professional waxing is expensive, but doing it yourself is not!!! i buy a kit from sallys beauty supply (I'm not sure if you have them where you are from but i'm sure you can find it online), i dont remember the brand name of it but it is a brazillian wax, it comes with a bucket of microwavable wax, a bunch of wooden application sticks, a ton of removal cloth and four other bottles of solution for slow growth, sanitization, extra wax removal and redness cover-up....its an incredible deal and its $16!!!!! ive bought so many of these kits because they have never down me wrong, all you need is the balls to do it yourself lol. ive tried all that bleaching and veet and nari stuff and it just burns holes in my skin....no good. so good luck with that, definately hope you give it a try its way worth it

amorbid_one

i mostly hate hair, other than my eyelashes and head hair. is there honestly something out there that can give me a smooth body, so my skin is bare, like some kind of awesome-ultra-pornstar shaver (lol) or wax or hair remover, because i am seriously thinking its time to be lasered (or whatever its called)... all my hair follicles on my body, save for the places i like hair to be. :P is this "lasering" off your hair a good idea? does anyone know? or is there a better or possibly easier, less expensive solution...?? i have always been worried that a wax or remover would make hair come in thicker or actually make certain hair into the corse pubic hair. i dont want that!!!!!!! ick. anyone?

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